Last Updated: Nov 28, 2022

Western Toilets in Japan

Where to Find One When Needed

When you’re sliding into first
And your pants begin to burst
That’s diarrhea, diarrhea

— The Diarrhea Song

First up, allow me to apologize. If you haven’t already realized, this is going to be a pretty shitty article. Scatological puns aside though, the topic of this post is of the utmost importance. What’s so special about today? Well, we’ll be talking about how to find a western toilet in a pinch. You see, few things are worse than needing to drop a deuce only to come upon one of the unspeakable horrors pictured above. According to the Japanese, these so-called “squatters” are supposedly good for your health. I call bullshit! Regardless, these tortuous contraptions are a secret hidden terror for foreign tourists who are making a mad dash to the lavatory.

In recent days, Japan has become well-known globally for its glorious heated washlets that go as far as washing your behind for you. Nevertheless, much to the dismay of many, there still exists many a traditional toilet lurking in the shadows. Luckily though, with a little bit of clever ingenuity, it’s possible to completely skip having to get naked just so you don’t poop in your pants…